Black tie, cocktail or elegant: how to read the dress code on your invitation

The invitation says simply ‘black tie’ or ‘elegant’, and your wardrobe holds three dresses that could work for any of them. A dress code tells you how formal the evening will be. It is not a rule with only one right answer. Read it together with the time, the venue and the season, and you will usually reach a calm decision fairly quickly.

Black tie: the formal evening

Traditionally, black tie means a gala evening: grand ceremonies, balls and weddings held in a very formal setting. For women, the usual guide is a long dress that reaches the floor or very nearly. The cut can be close-fitting, as in a mermaid silhouette, or full, with a skirt that moves. The fabric is what matters most.

The fabrics that suit a formal evening usually have some weight or a subtle sheen: satin, crepe, velvet, lace on a good base, layered chiffon. Notice how the skirt falls as you walk and how the dress looks from behind as well as from the front. At your fitting, take a few steps backwards and forwards, climb a step and turn round quickly. If the skirt tangles or rides up, you will feel it all evening.

For an example from our own collection, the Amour 18 evening dress is long and black, in embroidered velvet, with a mermaid cut, a deep V-neckline with a nude insert and a hand-sewn belt. It answers a formal evening well. At the time of writing it is in stock in size 38, and other sizes can be made to measure. Black is not compulsory at black tie, though it is the easiest colour to wear. Deep blue, emerald green and burgundy are just as appropriate.

And ‘black tie optional’?

This leaves room for choice. A long dress is still the safest option, but a midi dress or a very polished cocktail look with well-chosen accessories will not look out of place. If in doubt, go long.

Cocktail: more relaxed, but not casual

The cocktail dress code is common at afternoon and early-evening weddings, launches and celebration dinners. The hemline usually moves to the knee or just below, and midi dresses are an option too. This is not an evening for just ‘any nice dress’, though. The texture and the cut should show that you chose your outfit for the occasion.

A short dress gives you freedom of movement. You can sit down easily, dance without holding your skirt and get into a car without careful manoeuvres. Short dresses still need checking at your fitting. Sit down and see where the hem falls. Raise your arms to check that the bodice stays in place. Make sure any lace or embroidery does not scratch under the arms. Our collection of short evening dresses offers a range of cuts for evenings like these, from fine lace to structured taffeta.

One example from the catalogue is the Romance 86 evening dress: short and black, in Chantilly lace and tulle, available in size 38 at the time of writing. We mention it as a guide to cut and fabric, not as the only recommendation. The right dress depends on the evening and on you.

Elegant: the most open of the three

‘Elegant attire’ or ‘dress code: elegant’ is the vaguest wording, which is why it raises the most questions. It usually means the hosts want a polished evening without asking for either gala dress or strict cocktail wear. Long and midi dresses are both perfectly acceptable.

Rather than guessing, use the clues around it:

• The time. A ceremony at 5pm usually calls for a lighter look than one that begins at 8pm.
• The venue. A hotel, a ballroom or a grand villa suggests more formality than a garden or a restaurant.
• The season. Chiffon and fluid fabrics suit the warmer months. Velvet and heavy crepe make more sense in autumn and winter.
• Your role. The couple’s godparent, a parent, a witness or a guest: if your role puts you at the front of the room, you can go a step more formal than the invitation seems to ask.

If it is still unclear, it is perfectly fine to ask the hosts or someone in the family. One simple question, ‘long dress or something shorter?’, will settle more than any amount of interpretation.

What to check at your fitting, whatever the dress code

Always judge the hem with the shoes you will actually wear. A long dress that looks right with ballet flats may drag on the floor once you are in evening heels, and a hem that is too short at the back throws the line of the dress off balance. Tell us at your fitting which shoes you have chosen. If you do not have them yet, bring a pair with the same heel height.

Then check how comfortable the dress is in different positions: sitting, walking, climbing stairs and with your arms raised. If the dress has a corset or a structured bodice, notice how it feels after an hour, not just in the first few minutes. The edges should not dig in. The straps, sleeves and neckline will show you how freely you can move.

Some details only show in the evening: lace that catches the light, sequins that rustle, chiffon that moves with you. If you can, try the dress under lighting similar to the venue’s, and ask how the fabric wears and how best to store it.

When a few alterations are needed

A dress very rarely fits exactly as you want it at the first fitting. The length of the hem, the waist, the depth of a neckline or the width of the straps can all be discussed in the atelier. What can be altered depends on the cut and the fabric, and how long it takes depends on what is being changed. Any general guide is worth confirming directly, based on your dress and the date of your event. You can read more about our evening dress alterations.

If the invitation asks for a long dress and you are put off by the thought of a trailing skirt, start with our long evening dresses. Look for cuts with a full skirt or a slit, which give you more freedom of movement. To see the whole range at a glance, visit our evening dresses page.

If you have the invitation in front of you and still cannot decide, bring it with you to the atelier. We can read the dress code together and try on two or three options so you can see the difference for yourself. You can book a fitting online or by phone.